I magine a life partner, a family member or a close friend of yours is dying. How might she or he be feeling?
Facing death, being in pain maybe. What are her or his intimate needs and wishes? What happens to us when staying with a dying person?
How can we deal with the sorrow, the confusing thoughts and the trying situation? How should we communicate with her or him and with the family members and friends?
When a beloved person is dying we are touched to our deepest core. Difficult, painful emotions may rush up, settling in our heart.
Dying and death become a great challenger, breaking into our lives – which we try so hard to keep smooth and under control.
In this essay Jacqui James, an experienced medita- tor and meditation teacher, recounts the time she spent with her dying mother.
It is enlightening to see how her mindfulness and openness of heart guide her through the process in herself, the process of her mother dying and of the group around the deathbed.
Her family decides at one point to engage the help of a hospice nurse. Hospice workers are people spe- cially trained in accompanying and accommodating the dying.
They often have great sensitivity and prac- tical skills in relating with and caring for terminally ill people, a knowledge that has been lost in a world alienated from the experience of death.
“Enough, ânanda. Do not grieve.
Do not weep. Have I not told you before, ânanda, that all things that are dear and delightful are of the nature to change, to separate, to sever? So how could it be, ânanda – since whatever is born, become, compounded, and so is subject to decay – how could it be that it should not pass away?”
~ The Buddha, on the eve of His final passing away ~
