People say that you have what it takes, that you got the brains, the looks, the skill and all the ingredients you need to be successful at what you do.
We are, in the end a sum of all our experiences and when we grow, certain behaviors develop.
We react to each situation in a unique way because we are unique individuals, so when we often feel that we have free will, the truth is that, we sometimes get trapped by the way we react to certain situations, we are trapped by are automatic reaction to certain stimuli.
When these reactions are overwhelmingly negative, we call them self- defeating behaviors or SDB.
SDB is defined as “Those that engage in a cycle of failures in attempts to fulfill something they want. It can be a need for intimacy, affiliation, control, or acceptance which results in mental health difficulties which can include depression, social isolation, and anxiety.”
Without trying to sound too academic SDB is about setting yourself up for failure with or without your own knowledge. You might ask yourself “Why do I do this? Is there something wrong with me?” Well to keep things short and sweet, you were wired that way; something in your past has caused you to react to certain situations the way you do. You need to rewire yourself to get rid of all this negative behavior.
Here are 5 steps which can help you rid yourself of these unfavorable characteristics. Stop asking yourself “Why am I like this?” Instead, ask yourself “How can I change? What can I do to move forward and create a new and positive aura and vibe? What is it about me that am causing this? Is there something wrong with me?”
The funny thing is you might not even realize that you have this type of personal trait.
That’s why it is important to follow the steps even if you feel that you don’t this unfavorable characteristic, because you just might and it could be holding you back in your career, your family life, your love life, and in many of your interpersonal relationships.
The thing about self-defeating behaviors is that at the start they might not be a huge problem, but tend to take on a life of their own and cause unpleasant damages to yourself and to your relationships with other because this trait feeds on itself to create a vicious cycle.
So take a look at this article as a guide to discovering more about SDB and in ways of identifying if you have it.
Then take a look at a five step process in which you can address the problem and finally get rid of it. But remember this, it is a process and what took years to make and manifest will not disappear overnight.
But before we delve into that we need to take a look at the background of SDB and where they originate from.
