The worst pain imaginable is having someone that you love tell you that they don’t want to see you anymore.
I, personally, would rather have my legs amputated without anesthesia than go through this type of pain. It’s happened to me, it’s happened to you and just about anyone else who has ever been fortunate enough to fall in love.
As you are sitting around with your heart feeling like it’s been ripped out of your chest and fried up with liver and bacon, like something Hannibal Lector would eat, people will be telling you the following:
• You will get over it
• He/She was no good for you
• Time heals all wounds
• Move on (my personal favorite)
• It is his loss - you were way too good for him (or her, however the case may be).
These are all tried and true things that people say to try to make you feel better. Some people will be bold enough to start trash talking your ex lover and telling you how they never liked his ears, how he was always burping in front of people and how he made a play for them when he was drunk at last year’s Christmas party.
This does not make you feel better. As a matter of fact, nothing that anyone says can make you feel better.
Let’s face it - your heart has been ripped out and trampled on. And no one can say anything to change that. Except me. I can tell you something that can make you feel better because I can tell you how to
get your ex lover back.
The first time I tried this, I was 19 years old. I had a boyfriend who I liked but I could tell that his interest in me was waning.
I immediately felt that this was because of the fact that I wouldn’t put out. But the truth of the matter was that I was too clingy. I began by liking him a little, started to like him a lot and started to show my feelings.
The more he pulled away, the more clingy I became. It really didn’t help matters that he lived across the street. It also didn’t help matters that his mother seemed to want us to get married and would often tell him what a great cook I was and how I helped my mother around the house.
This was especially shocking because I was neither a great cook and never lifted a finger to help my mother. His mom liked me, though and I guess wanted to get her 20 year old son out of the house.
Anyway, I could feel him pulling away but seemed powerless to do anything about my clinginess, although I was smart enough to know, even at that young age, that it was driving him away. The night finally came where he said the fatal words - “We have to talk.”
I knew what was coming and, at that moment, decided to enact a plan to get him back. Even as he was giving me the axe, so to speak, I was thinking of a way to get my ex lover back. Technically, he was not my lover, I was good girl, but you get the point.
When he told me that he wanted to stop going out, I shrugged it off and said “okay, no biggie.” Inside, I felt like a he put a knife right through me, but I managed to keep my cool.
He was shocked. He had been so sure of the fact that I was clingy and needy (and I was, so he wasn’t wrong) that he was really taken aback.
And said so. He then told me how he didn’t want to get married. I told him that that was not my intention, I was only 19 and had a lot of living to do. I then proceeded to get out of the car and walk to my door.
Before I could get to the door, he grabbed me and kissed me. This was odd, but I continued with my plan. I wasn’t sure how this was going to work, but I knew that whatever else happened, I still had my pride.
The next morning, I stayed home from work and spent the day throwing up and alternately looking out the window for his car. I was determined to get him back, but didn’t know how.
I made a few mistakes. I made myself too available at the house because I was friendly with his sister. He saw me there and I acted nervous when I saw him. I also visited with his mother. She was on my side. He seemed aloof.
Something interceded that helped me, although I didn’t know it at the time. I met another boyfriend. I started to go out with the other boyfriend and took my mind off of my ex lover across the street. One day, I was outside washing my car and he came over to chat.
And low and behold, he asked me out on a date! I wasn’t even trying to get back with him at that point. I told him I was busy on the night he asked me out but could make it another time.
Again, I acted unimpressed, but inside my heart was leaping. He asked me out for another night and I said “sure, I don’t care.”
We got back together. This time, I vowed not to act clingy or needy.
The relationship did not last, but when we parted ways a year or so later, we did so as friends and it was a mutual decision.
When someone breaks up with you, they often break your heart. The last thing you want to hear is how you will mend.
Yes, you will mend eventually, but this is not the time for anyone to say things like “time heals all wounds” because it really doesn’t help at all. You are better off dissing the ex.
The funny thing is that people break up and get back together all of the time. This is no big deal. My son just got back with his ex girlfriend who he dated for over a year and with whom he had broken up with for nearly a year. He was devastated at the breakup, but used the advice in this book and won her back.
Think about it - if someone liked you enough to go out with you for a while and continue a relationship for more than a few dates, there was something there.
There can be a variety of different reasons why he or she broke the relationship. In most cases, one person is moving along too quickly for the other person. In other words, you are not both on the same track.
The person who is moving too quickly has to slow down and get on track with the other party and get them to move along a little in order for the reunion to work. This is not difficult and happens all of the time. If you follow the rules.
This book will take you step by step and teach you how to get your ex lover back. This is not “stalking.” This is not obsession. This is not even unhealthy. This is simply about getting giving yourself another chance at something that you want.
The mindset to “give up” is not a good one to have. You need to be a little persistent if you want to get things done in life.
You also have to know where to draw the line at persistence. You certainly do not want to give your attention to someone who is telling you to get lost.
Follow the examples of this book and you will understand exactly how you can go about getting back your ex lover and keeping him or her for good.
